Sunday, October 26, 2008
Today at church was so fantastic, it really really was. The last couple weeks, I haven't truly been feeling church and I've been having messed up thoughts that I keep trying to push out of my mind and it's not working.
It's so stupid but what started all this was something that Bongo Man said, something so tiny. We were talking about something I don't know what but he said that I might think differently when I'm not so religious. I thought that that was never going to happen but I keep thinking about what he said. He didn't say if, he said when. I feel like I have such a tenuous hold sometimes with my faith and I don't want to lose it. I never want to lose it.
I am so afraid of that. And today, during church, I was thinking about it. When Pastor Chuck had an alter call for those who wanted to be closer to the Holy Spirit, I went up there to pray about spiritual gifts but it ended up me sort of begging God to not let go of me.
That's my greatest fear. Lord, don't let go of me. Keep holding on to me; I don't want to live without you. I don't want to go back. Change my heart and my mind. Just stay with me; hold me the tightest possible way. Hold on to me.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
I hate it when people don't do things!! I'm talking about Brian and his complete lack of interest in helping out with anything really. He is NOT that busy. And I don't care if he doesn't have artistic abilities; neither do I!!! But I'm still going to the poster making party. I can't stay the whole time because I actually have work to do and will probably do it instead of playing TimeSplitters or whatever the crap he does! Ugh!! People like that just make me sooooooooo mad!!!!! That's all. Just had to vent.
Friday, October 24, 2008
105 Things You Might Not Know About Me (cheap post, i know, but i'm bored)
0 comments Posted by Heather at 4:23 PM1. EVER BEEN GIVEN AN ENGAGEMENT RING?
nope!
2. LONGEST RELATIONSHIP?
um...like 2 weeks (doing better than kdee!! haha!)
3. LAST GIFT YOU RECEIVED?
construction paper from rob; or lemonade from matt and brian
4. EVER DROPPED A CELL PHONE?
hahaha...duh; it's me
5.WHEN’S THE LAST TIME YOU WORKED OUT?
skit practice yesterday should count!!
6. THING(S) YOU SPEND A LOT OF MONEY ON?
i don't even know; it's like it just disappears
7. LAST FOOD YOU ATE?
hotdog, fries, carrots, apple sauce and water!!
8. FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
eyes
9. ONE FAVORITE SONG?
corona and lime--Shwayze
10. WHERE DO YOU LIVE?
right now? here
11. HIGH SCHOOL YOU ATTENDED:
BRCS
12. CELL PHONE SERVICE PROVIDER:
AT&T: More Bars in More Places!!
13. FAVORITE MALL STORE:
Papaya
14. LONGEST JOB YOU HAD:
11 months tutoring (a.k.a. babysitting) middle schoolers
15. DO YOU OWN A PAIR OF DICE?
Unfortunately, no
16. Do YOU PRANK CALL PEOPLE?
yes (but only because ryan makes me!! :)
17. LAST WEDDING YOU ATTENDED:
Betty's
18. FIRST FRIEND YOU’D CALL IF YOU WON THE LOTTERY:
Beth, Ryan, or Shannan
19. LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR BEST FRIEND:
depending on who we're talking about, about an hour ago or about 2 months ago
20. FAVORITE FAST FOOD RESTAURANT:
Burger King
21. BIGGEST LIE YOU HAVE EVER HEARD:
There is no God----LIE!!!!
23. WHERE’S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO EAT WITH FRIENDS?
IDK, ryan's house?
24. CAN YOU COOK?
I would like to think so...
25. WHAT CAR DO YOU DRIVE?
i don't; ergo, my loserness
26. BEST KISSER:
haha. no
27. LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
2 days ago
28. MOST DISLIKED FOODS:
a lot of fish, a lot of seafood, other gross things that i don't like
30. THING YOU DISLIKE MOST ABOUT YOURSELF:
my inability to defend myself and my faith
32. LONGEST SHIFT YOU HAVE WORKED AT A JOB?
8 hours
33. FAVORITE MOVIE?:
French Kiss
34. CAN YOU SING?
my friends say no, i say i'm a rock star and they're just hatin'
35. LAST CONCERT ATTENDED?
no idea
36. LAST KISS?
a month ago?? who cares.
37. LAST MOVIE RENTED:
if that means from the front desk...the comedy with angelina jolie that i forgot the title of
38.ONE THING YOU NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE WITHOUT:
cell phone and lip gloss
39. FAVORITE VACATION SPOT:
my room
43. LAPTOP OR DESKTOP COMPUTER?
laptop
44. FAVORITE COMEDIAN?
eddie izzard
45. DO YOU SMOKE?
ew, no
46. SLEEP WITH OR WITHOUT CLOTHES?
with clothes, but with not a lot of them
47. WHO SLEEPS WITH YOU EVERY NIGHT?
teddy
48. DO LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS WORK?
they can if God wants them to
49. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BEEN PULLED OVER BY THE POLICE?
never, cuz i'm cool like that
50. PANCAKES OR FRENCH TOAST?
what the french, toast?
51. DO YOU LIKE COFFEE?
gross
52 HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?
scrambled with lots of pepper
53. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY?
no; it's fun to read, that's all
54. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
bethany joyce
55. LAST PERSON ON YOUR MISSED CALL LIST?
Daddy
56. WHAT WAS THE LAST TEXT MESSAGE YOU RECIEVED?
Facebook Status Update:: Kdee Luke is leave me aloooooooooone. Reply to msg. '@' to update status. 'unsub' to ignore Kdee...To turn off Facebook texts, reply 'OFF'
58. NUMBER OF PILLOWS?
1, but my stuffed animals work as pillows sometimes too
59. WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?:
jeans, american eagle hoodie, tank top with a sea horse on it, 2 unmatched socks, and sneakers
61. WHAT KIND OF JELLY DO YOU LIKE ON YOUR PB & J?
strawberry:
62. CAN YOU PLAY POOL?
not well...
63. CAN YOU SWIM?
the last time i went swimming, i almost drowned, so i'm thinking not well
64. FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
mint chocolate chip
65. DO YOU LIKE MAPS?
not particularly. do you like pumpkins??
66. TELL ME A RANDOM FACT ABOUT YOURSELF:
My cactus' names are ursuala and spongebob (they're both boys)
68. EVER ATTEND A THEME PARTY?
falalalalalala....christmas!!
69. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON
fall when i'm home, spring when i'm here
70. LAST TIME YOU LAUGHED AT SOMETHING STUPID?
oh, probably like 2 minutes ago
71. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP THIS MORNING ?
my alarm clock went off at 8:45. i ended up getting up at 9:40
72. BEST THING ABOUT WINTER?
there's a GOOD thing about winter? news to me!!!
73. LAST TIME A COP GAVE YOU A TICKET?
never!!!
75. NAME OF YOUR FIRST PET?
Bam-Bam the Beagle
76. DO YOU THINK PIRATES ARE COOL OR OVERRATED?
Pirates are overrated; Johnny Depp is cool
77. WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS WEEKEND?
prayer, skit practice, church, poster-making party, andy's mom's b-day party, homework, tons of other things
78. BIRTHDATE:
May 17th
79. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE:
your mom :)
85. ARE YOU ON A LAPTOP?
yessir!!
87. ARE YOU SMILING?
oh-so-slightly
89. DO YOU MISS SOMEONE RIGHT NOW?
nope; i'm content (though I miss my daddy a little, and my mama, and my sissies)
90. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD WHERE WOULD YOU GO?
Iran
92. ARE YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL?
been there; done that93. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH?
i don't think so...do you?
94. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NAME?
oceanblossom peaches
95. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BATHING SUIT?
black and tan
96. DOES YOUR SCHOOL START IN AUGUST?
yes
97. DID YOU GO ON VACATION LAST MONTH?
that word is not in my vocabulary
98. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A CRUISE?
no
99. DO YOU HAVE A SISTER
i have TWO of them! oooooooooooh!!
100. ARE YOU UPSTAIRS?
third floor yo!
101. ARE YOU IN LOVE?
i <3>
102. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN THE HOSPITAL?
a week for poison ivy!!
103. DO YOU WISH YOU COULD SEE ANYONE PARTICULAR RIGHT NOW?
yes
104. WHAT JEWELRY ARE YOU WEARING?
my cross
105. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO AFTER THIS SURVEY?
round up the peeps for some dinnah!!!
I hope you all have had an amazing time learning about me. Pce out!!
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Ever do something really stupid; like immensely retarded. Something that could potentially and usually does hurt someone in the process of being fun or funny? Welcome to my life!
I'm retarded! And I hate it! This week has been such a crap week! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Well, that is all I have to say.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Je suis inferme. Je suis tres inferme. I love being able to complain in french. It somehow makes me feel better.
For those of you who are not lucky enough to speak this language, I'm sick! And I hate it. I despise it. I feel dizzy when I walk, my ears hurt like crap, and I cough sooooo much. I don't want to be sick! At least wait until this week is over! It's been a weird week so don't make me sick on top of it!!
But I have Shonda as a roommate and Shonda is amazing. She brought me tea today and told me not to die, which is very nice of her. I'm sorry if I get you sick Shonda! I'm sorry if I get anyone sick! I love you all and will try to take care of you too!
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
First of all, I did stick up for you. You are one of my closest friends. I was angry when I said that I didn't want to be friends with you anymore and honestly, half the time you do treat me like crap. I am going to be friends with you because I miss you. Whether you want to believe that or not is up to you. This is going way too far. We need to sit down and talk about this. This is going way farther than what I did; this is going into stuff that should have been talked about long ago. We need to talk.
