Sunday, September 9, 2007
So, I've been here for about 2 weeks and it's already starting. First the thing that's really bothering and then I'll get to some old and/or not so important things.
There's a guy here who's incredibly sweet and he's funny. Yesterday, he kissed me (my first kiss). Then, while he was walking me back to my dorm, he was walking ahead of me, talking on the phone, basically just ignoring me. Before we left, he didn't even look me in the eye. Today, he's here, in my hall, but he didn't talk to me, didn't say hi to me, didn't even acknowledge that I was in the freaking room. I don't get it. I don't know what to think anymore; it's incredibly awkward being around him but we have mutual friends and we're supposed to be friends, so I can't just not be around when he's around. No one knows what happened either; I didn't tell anyone because he was acting so weird on the way back here yesterday. Plus my other friend, Stephanie, likes him too. She's been so emotional lately and I don't want to hurt her. This is such a crappy situation and I definitly don't need it; I don't want it. If I could go back, I would have totally left with Dave and Stephanie when they did. I would not have stayed in the room alone with him. I don't know what I'm going to do. And, to top everything off, I'm being a hypocrite. Beth met a guy named Erik who she really likes and is dating and I told her to-I didn't tell her not to be with him, but I think I came pretty darn close because of the fact that she didn't know him that well. If your reading this Beth, I'm sorry.
Now for the not so important stuff (even though that is still bothering me). There's a guy here, named Dave, who is basically a sweet person way down deep. However, like Bridgette says, there's no filter between the brain and the mouth so he says whatever comes to mind. This is incredibly annoying and potentially hurtful to some people. Traci, a transfer, has anxiety attacks and Dave set one off. She was mad at him for about a day and a half which made the rest of us tenser than anything. She talked to him but it still seems weird to me a little. I don't know; she says she just wants to start anew but I don't think I can do that, I'm always going to remember that. Just like I'm always going to remember what happened with Rob. I may forget about for a couple days, but it's always going to come back when he says something stupid.
I guess that's just about it. I'm going to clean my room for a while, my room-mate isn't here. More on her later.
